Brave

I have always loved this quote:

 but when I really get down to it I am most comfortable in the familiar.  I like my usual routine.  So much so that my kids have a pretty clear cut routine that gets followed, most days.  I don't scare myself often enough.  Lately I have been feeling really comfortable at work.  Too much so.  I'm really comfortable with my principal, my co-workers and my place in my building.  This is my 9th year teaching the same grade, at the same school.  The only difference is the kids and I had a new teaching partner this year.  I've started to feel like I need a push.

 

So I took a jump.  I decided to apply for a position in a different building.  A building with clientele much different than ours.  We have almost 65% of our families that qualify for free and reduced, this school has 11%.  I have had a number of friends and co-workers that have left my building in the last few years for a different school, but this isn't it.  We just moved into the attendance area of my friends' school and I really want my kids to go there but I don't want to work where my kids go to school.  (This is for a different post.)  If I was going to jump ship, it was going to be onto my own life boat.

 

And I'm scared.  My heart pounded as I submitted my name, at the final hour, I cried when I told my principal.  I'm scared I won't be good enough.  I'm scared I won't live up to expectations.  Expectations that I KNOW will make me a better teacher.  I'm scared I won't be able to handle the parents. 

 

But I'm not stressed about NOT getting the job.  I know I can stay where I am comfortable.  Where I know I am valued.  Where I have great co-workers and students that have challenged me.  I know I will continue to work on my behavior management.  (We have a VERY rough group coming up.)

 

I am still waiting on an answer.  I interviewed over two weeks ago and I was told I'd know by the following Friday.  Well, it has been more than a week past that Friday.  The waiting is hard.  I've only told my teaching partner, a close friend and my principal.  I feel in limbo and I'd like to find out so I can move on. 

 

I've been listening to this song a lot lately:
http://youtu.be/McdMwOV0y6c

I can't get the video to embed.